Dear Friends, today I’m pondering my sweet little boy and his special needs.  We think that our little bundle of joy energy is on the autism spectrum.  He has trouble with church, restaurants and other places where he is expected to follow rules that he cannot understand.  He has an aide at school to help him stay on track, but otherwise, I’m his full time helper.  Not being at work full time (I mean getting in the car, driving to a building where I sit in a grey cube all day, get paid a few dollars after gas and daycare to stare at a computer and get verbally abused to which I reply thanks for the ‘constructive’ criticism.), I’ve got some time to reflect on what’s important in life again.  I realized God must see us in the same way.  He gave us an instruction manual – the Bible – which we don’t use correctly, and we are running around trying to figure out why things are going wrong and how to keep things together, since we don’t know the rules.  In this way, we all have special needs, then don’t we?  In order to be a better mom for my son, I decided to take a look at how God does the parenting for me.

#1) Be patient.  If I spend time in the Word every day, my errors are usually pretty apparent right away.  Thankfully God is slow to anger, says the Bible.  Staying calm with my boy helps him to stay calm too.

#2) Make the rules clear and simple.  God gave us a ten step plan to easily follow His will.  Jesus further simplified it into two main rules.  Love the Lord your God with everything you have in you, and then love your neighbor.  Easy.  Okay that’s easier said than done, but it’s straightforward, and you can’t argue with that.  Show adoration for the one who created you, and show that you care about everyone that He created.  When my son has a picture schedule or I break things down into really simple steps, one at a time, he fares a lot better.

#3) Appreciate the sweetness of just being together.  “The law of the LORD is perfect, converting the soul: the testimony of the LORD is sure, making wise the simple.  The statutes of the LORD are right, rejoicing the heart: the commandment of the LORD is pure, enlightening the eyes.   The fear of the LORD is clean, enduring for ever: the judgments of the LORD are true and righteous altogether.  More to be desired are they than gold, yea, than much fine gold: sweeter also than honey and the honeycomb.“  (Psalm 19:7-10 KJV)  “I love sitting next to you.” (Eric King)

#4) Join the mutual admiration society.  God loves us (it’s in the Bible a few times).  We love Him because He first loved us, and He gave us His own son to redeem us in spite of ourselves.  It’s easy to love my son in part because of his pure, sweet innocence.  Likewise, he loves me, in spite of my imperfections.  The feelings are mutual all the way around.

#5) There are always opportunities to learn and grow.  Today, we are going to the pool to work on our swimming.  While we are there, we learn telling time:  Watch the clock to make sure we leave in time for kindergarten.  We learn social skills:  Don’t splash other people in the face, and go to the bathroom before you get in the pool.  We learn about authority:  Listen to the lifeguards when they tell you to put on your walking feet.  We learn to love our neighbors:  Show concern for someone who gets a booboo, and play with someone who doesn’t have a friend in the pool.  Honor Mom when she says to get out of the pool and get dressed.  We learn math by counting the coins to put in the vending machine to buy apple slices.  God’s blessings come for us when we follow His rules.  To follow the rules, we have to learn them first.

Don’t be so hard on yourself.  Allow yourself to grow and learn because we all have special needs.  Go ye therefore, and train up some disciples (don’t forget your children are mini disciples in the works).